Becoming The Change

Organizing a Nonviolent Communication (NVC) training with two trainers I met in Costa Rica has been my greatest drive and goal in life recently. I was so inspired by their work and way of embodying NVC that I really wanted to bring this to our community in Auroville.

Nonviolent Communication is sometimes referred to as an awareness practice, camouflaged as a communication tool. In other words, it’s a process through which we create a quality of connection out of which people naturally enjoy contributing to one another’s wellbeing.

I am so thrilled that Alan Rafael Seid (Rafa Kalapa) and Tess Burke enthusiastically accepted my invitation to come teach a 7-day NVC training. Creating opportunities like this for collective growth is really what makes my soul come alive.

Tess Burke

Rafa Kalapa

We explored a wide array of topics in the NVC context, including spirituality and inner growth, ikigai, death, our relationship with money, romantic relationships and sexuality, parenting and working with children, and positive social change. We named it Becoming the Change. The structure included talks, pair practices, group discussions, role plays, presentations, games, and processes in small groups.

It was really fulfilling to see how the participants shifted from being a bunch of strangers in a room into something more connected and intentional: a space where people felt more comfortable being real with each other, building a shared sense of trust.

There was a moment that really stayed with me. One morning, after our triad check-in, a participant spoke about how the ongoing war in her country of origin was affecting her deeply. I felt honored that she trusted the group enough to share her tears and sorrow, held by the presence of everyone there. It was deeply touching to witness how we collectively dropped into a more present and connected space in response to her vulnerability and sincerity.(Note: she gave her consent to write about that instance.)

It was a huge learning experience for me, being both a participant as well as an organizer. I got so much out of the sessions, and also from learning how to navigate the coordination of tasks during the training. One thing that really helped me when I felt overwhelmed was learning to pause before saying yes to everything. When someone asked me to do something, I started taking a moment to consider whether it was really necessary for me to take it on, or whether it could be done in another way.

It was also a leap into the unknown because it was my first time organizing something on this scale and with trainers coming from abroad. Behind the scenes, there was so much preparation that I hadn’t even imagined. There were months when we didn’t know whether it would be possible to make it happen, but I kept going because it was the project I felt most committed to bringing into reality. At one point, I even felt like I wanted to see it through no matter what. I am filled with joy that it was possible to bring it to life.

Today, this feels like only the beginning. My dream is to continue creating opportunities like this and organizing events that create meaningful impact in the community. I really believe that small shifts in consciousness and in the way individuals relate to themselves and others can add up to a much greater change in the world.

Monica Matsumoto

Monica Matsumoto